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Glasses

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“There is no harm in repeating a good thing”

Plato

My last post to this forum was entitled ‘Making a Spectacle’- and related the tale of the efforts that I had been obliged to make throughout the year in order that I might make use of the shiny new pair of spectacles that I had purchased back at the top thereof.

Should the gentle reader have seen that post he or she will be aware that the loss of a tiny screw had rendered the glasses unusable – and that it somehow took four visits to the optometrist to obtain a replacement.

Subsequent to that posting I found myself looking back over my missives from this time last year. This I do from time to time – to remind myself of all the things that we have achieved as well as the various things that we have not. I am repeatedly reminded that my decision to continue blogging – even since so to do fell deeply out of fashion – has endowed us with a truly useful archive of arcana covering the last decade and a half.

Anyway… what should I find in the archive from the middle of December last year – but yet another post also entitled ‘Making a Spectacle‘. What are the odds?

Now, last December’s post was not on the subject of the state of repair of one of our many pairs of glasses (why does one require so many as one grows older?). It was more concerned with whether or not we could actually find the said item at the point at which we needed them (and indeed whether or not we were in fact already wearing them upon one or other of our heads!).

I feel that I should probably be apologising for the inevitable repetitions that seem to go along with advancing years. I am rather hoping that – since those surrounding us are also getting on a bit now – they in turn will be forgetting that we have already covered much of this ground – and treat each new adventure as though it were the first time.

Cheers!

 

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Back at the top of the year I found myself – for only the second time in my life – eligible for extended heath benefits… courtesy of the College by which I was then employed.

Those who are paying attention might wonder why I had not enjoyed this boon throughout the previous half decade of my unexpectedly lengthened working life. The simple truth is that I had to this point – like an idiot – repeatedly turned the offer down. No sooner was I finally equipped with the full set of benefits than the job rapidly followed their example and evaporated.

(I notice that one can – should one so wish – purchase a T-shirt bearing the apposite slogan – “I saw that…” – Karma).

Irregardless!…

Serving one final term at the College before being retired (again) I took the opportunity to avail myself of all of the benefits for which I qualified. I had some serious dental work done and – more relevant to the subject of this particular post – I purchased some new spectacles.

Now, it was not that I actually needed spectacles. Over the last decade or so my vision has slowly but surely improved to the point at which I really only wear glasses now for driving. I have several slightly cosmetically ratty but completely functional pairs which seem to meet my limited needs. Nonetheless, taking the opportunity to equip myself with some stylish new eyepieces seemed like a good idea…

…and very nice they were – for a couple of months. Then – one fine day – the right hand arm fell off. One of the little screws – apparently completely inadequate for the task for which it had been provided – had dropped out and, inevitably, disappeared.

I revisited the optometrist. Following an extensive rummage out at the back of the store the assistant returned and advised me that they would need to order a replacement screw – and that they would call me when it was in.

Several further months passed – as months do – and my phone remained ominously silent.

I revisited the optometrist – again. Following an extensive rummage… etc, etc… you probably get the drift. There was no record of my first visit having taken place and no replacement part.

Several months passed… yada, yada, yada… I revisited… etc, etc… no record of either of my previous visits!

How was this to end? Well, on my fourth visit a rather more senior assistant finally did the obvious thing… she found another pair of the same frames – extracted one of the screws and then restored my new glasses to a fully operational state.

Hoo – bloomin’ – rah, say I!

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